Thursday, March 15, 2012

was it enough . . .

HnJ

Skittles and Kisses are getting married in July (July 28th) for those of you who missed the engagement sessions you can click the link below.

Skittles and Kisses

I am excited for them.  I love Kisses!  I think she is a great person.  She is beautiful, but beyond that, her heart is beautiful. Anyone who meets her can see Jesus in her life and in the way she lives. That is what makes it so exciting for us that she will be a new member of our family.

With all the marital issues in my small circle of friends I would be a little na├»ve to think that Skittles and Kisses would be exempt from problems.  Still, this is what I pray.  Not that they would live “happily ever after” but that they would be able to face the circumstances life throws at them . . .  together!

Santa and I were talking while on our way to Shreveport this past weekend.  You know just talking in the car like married people do sometimes. We were talking about how it was when we were growing up and how Skittles would be married soon and starting his own family. 

It’s so exciting for me . . .but with my A.D.D. and all sometimes I skip over the “sad” of it and head straight for the excitement of the whole thing.  (I know I’m a weirdo.)  But that day, I did pause long enough to wonder . . .

I wondered (out loud to Santa) if we were a good enough example of a married couple for Skittles and Reese’s.  You know the other 2 girls were really living most of their lives with their father.  So, while we were an example to them, their experience is so different.  But were we a good example of how to be married?  I mean we were married, but did we do it right?

Of course, Santa’s answer was logical and that’s one of the things that keeps me from floating away in my own thoughts sometimes . . . he said, “Our example is what it is . . .. there’s no changing it now.”

very true

The example you are living out in front of your children . . . and the example Santa and I lived in front of our children is their blueprint for how life will be in their future.

Kisses’ mom and dad lived out a different blueprint in front of her and her sisters.  Was their blueprint good enough? 

These two young people are going to bring together two completely different sets of house plans and are going to start building a life together.  That’s how I see it, at least. 

If you have always imagined having a RED (fire engine, lights flashing RED) living room and your new husband has ALWAYS imagined having a neutral TAN (calm, peaceful, TAN) living room . . . well you can see how this might cause a problem when you start building a house together.

A life is way different from the paint in a living room.  What if you expect to have a “red” life and your new spouse expects to have a “tan” life?

We had to build our house with our spouse. . . . and now they will have to figure all that stuff out. 

As parents, sometimes we don’t realize.  We have our own issues.  We are trying to make a living, we are trying to raise our children, succeed in life, make enough money to retire, volunteer our time, pursue our hobbies . . . or whatever else we do, but do we try to be a good example for our children?

The point is, it’s important to live out the life you hope for your children in front of them.  How else are they going to learn?  Certainly not from watching television or following the media of today.  Television is filled with dysfunctional families and a fantasy life that no one can possibly achieve.  Even reality television is scripted. 

I was in the car with Reese’s a few months ago.  I was probably 1/4 of the way home (we live 8 miles out of town) so maybe two or three miles into the drive home when I remembered to call Santa and ask if he needed anything.  He said he would really like some cookies and we needed milk.  (Or whatever it was . .. something not life threatening.)

I turned the car around.  Reese’s was aggravated. 

“What are you doing?” 

I told her Dad wants cookies (or whatever it was).

She said, “So you just turn around?” 

I said, “Yes.  You’ll be alright.”  Thinking that she was complaining about not going straight home or something.

She thought for a moment and said, “You guys spoil each other, you know that?”

I thought that was a very sweet thing to say.  Thinking back on it now . . . isn’t that what we are supposed to do with the person we married?  Spoil them? 

I pray that Skittles and Kisses spoil each other and have a super-fabulous-can’t-believe-God-loves-us-THIS-much-cup-filled-to-overflowing life together! 

 

Photobucket

Daisypath Christmas tickers

1 comment:

  1. As my kids have gotten married, I've had the same thoughts about the example Dan & I set for them. It's so humbling to me when one of them will come to me now and say that they appreciate something about our marriage. We did try to live our lives right in front of them and not shield them from the good or bad things in married life. Sometimes we succeeded, sometimes we failed, but as Santa said, we can't change it now. And frankly, I wouldn't want to!

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