Thursday, February 23, 2012


In our church, we have a group of moms who meet once a month to share with one another.  Crafts, daycare, networking and loving each other are all on the agenda.  It’s a great way to connect with other moms!  If you live in our town (or know someone who does) you should check it out!   Click the logo above to go to their facebook page and see what it’s all about.

They asked if I would speak to their group this month.  I chose to speak about “Being a Proverbs 31 Wife”  or being a submissive wife . . . I know right?  Not a popular subject. But it is kinda my passion, to teach other women what I have learned about being a wife.

Striving to be a Proverbs 31 Wife
Some women think this means they are a slave to their husbands.  Not at all.  This means that you give up your own will and replace it with the will of your husband. That is not a slave.  A slave does not know the will of his master, he only obeys orders spelled out to him. 

When you “help” your husband achieve his dreams you are easier to love.  I don’t know if that makes sense, but that’s how I see it.  We are not called to have a 50/50 partnership with our husbands.  We are called to serve them (or help them). 

One thing I see young married women do more than anything is to criticize their husbands to their friends.  They think it’s perfectly fine to tell anyone who will listen all of their husband’s faults.  Even down to the underwear he leaves on the floor. 

Really?  If you heard your husband talking to some of his buddies about some of your bad habits, or about YOUR UNDERWEAR?  You would hit the roof!!! 

Every time you criticize your husband to your friends or family you give them permission to hate dislike your husband.

Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ. The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. So just as the church submits to Christ as he exercises such leadership, wives should likewise submit to their husbands.  Ephesians 5:22-24

You are to submit to your husband  . . . as to the Lord!

Think about the way you treated your husband this week

. . . yeah, I know. . . .

would you treat Jesus that way?

I once asked Santa what my best characteristic was (you know for one of those facebook surveys) and his response really made me think.  He said, “Agreeable.  You are agreeable.”

Four different chapters in Proverbs warns men about quarrelsome wives.
Proverbs 19:13
A foolish child is a father’s ruin, and a quarrelsome wife is like the constant dripping of a leaky roof.
Proverbs 19:12-14 (in Context) Proverbs 19 (Whole Chapter)
Proverbs 21:9
Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.
Proverbs 21:8-10 (in Context) Proverbs 21 (Whole Chapter)
Proverbs 25:24
Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.
Proverbs 25:23-25 (in Context) Proverbs 25 (Whole Chapter)
Proverbs 27:15
A quarrelsome wife is like the dripping of a leaky roof in a rainstorm;
Proverbs 27:14-16 (in Context) Proverbs 27 (Whole Chapter)

The best advice I can give for staying happily married is to agree with your husband.  Agree even if he is wrong, if you are in public.  If your husband points out one of your flaws . . . agree with him. 

For example,
After the wife does something dumb while driving. . . .
Husband:  “Wow, you are really are not a good driver.”
Wife:  “I know.  I have A.D.D. and I don’t pay attention like I should.”
This response can change the husband’s response.
The next time the wife did something dumb behind the wheel, she told someone, “Yeah, I’m not a very good driver.”
He defended her, “It’s not that you are a bad driver, it’s that you could pay a little more attention.  You know you still haven’t had an accident.”

This is not a real example (it’s pretty close), but you see.  When it wasn’t an argument, it somehow turned around. 

Try agreeing with your husband on just one subject or just one thing.  See what happens.  This is supposed to be the person you love and chose above everyone else to spend your life with . . . . you need to be on the same team.

The only way I know to team up with someone is to be in some kind of agreement with that person.  Find something you can agree on and focus on that until you get the hang of letting your stubbornness go!
The time I was able to share at mom2mom was a lot of fun for me, but more than that I loved to hear the other mom’s stories and how they were dealing with their own husbands.  It was very encouraging. 
I’m pretty sure that I didn’t say half of these things.  I really don’t remember what all I said to them it’s all such a blur. 

I hope they heard God’s voice reminding them of what He commands, and not me harping on them.  Giving God all the glory and lifting up each of the moms to be blessed by Him.

Don’t forget to enter the giveaway for The Guardian Duke.


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